Trevor Noah has a deep love and respect for his parents, Patricia and Robert Noah.
The pair first met while living in the same apartment building in downtown Johannesburg. Patricia, who is Black, was secretly living in a flat owned by a White man, and Robert, a Swiss-German restaurateur, was residing across the hall. For more than 30 years, South Africa had already been living under apartheid, which meant their friendship was a crime and illegal. Nevertheless, that didn’t stop them from having a child.
Trevor was born on Feb. 20, 1984, at Hillbrow Hospital. Patricia was alone in the operating room, having been estranged from her relatives and pregnant with a White man’s baby. In his 2016 memoir, Born a Crime, Trevor wrote that his very existence was a crime in and of itself.
“The doctors took her up to the delivery room, cut open her belly, and reached in and pulled out a half-white, half-black child who violated any number of laws, statutes, and regulations — I was born a crime,” he wrote.
Patricia, Robert and Trevor’s lives were met with challenges. There was abuse, alcoholism, violence and racism coupled with estrangement and poverty. However, Patricia and Robert remained a united front for Trevor, despite never getting married. Trevor has credited his mom for her willingness to never give up fighting despite their hardships.
"I thought that I was the hero of my story, [but] in writing it I came to realize over time that my mom was the hero," he told NPR. "I was lucky enough to be in the shadow of a giant. My mom's magic dust sprinkled on me and I hope I have enough of it to be as brave as she was and continues to be."
Keep reading to learn more about Trevor Noah’s parents, Patricia and Robert Noah, and their relationship with the famous comedian.
Robert opened one of the first racially-integrated restaurants in Johannesburg
Prior to moving to Johannesburg in the late 1970s, Robert worked as a chef in Montreal and New York. He dabbled in the industrial food service industry and even opened a handful of bars and restaurants before settling down in South Africa, where he currently resides.
In his book Born a Crime, Trevor wrote that Robert had to obtain a special license that allowed him to welcome both Black and White customers into his establishment. Though the license was hard to come by, Robert opened a steakhouse that became known as one of the first integrated restaurants in Johannesburg under apartheid, and it was an immediate success.
“Black people came because there were few upscale establishments where they could eat, and they wanted to come and sit in a nice restaurant and see what that was like. White people came because they wanted to see what it was like to sit with black people," he wrote, adding that the restaurant had a "great vibe" because it brought people together.
Patricia ran away from home at 22 years old
Itching to live her own life and unhappy at home, Patricia ran away from her mother’s place in Soweto when she was 22 years old. She moved to downtown Johannesburg, where it was illegal for Black people to live; eventually, Patricia met a German man, who allowed her to get a flat in his name as long as she paid rent.
She dressed up in a maid’s uniform to not draw attention to herself and carried her ID number at all times — the identification card allowed Black people to enter the city for work — Trevor explained in his memoir. When Patricia was caught without her ID or in a White-peoples-only area, she was forced to pay a fine or face jail time.
Robert and Patricia were first neighbors
When Robert first met Patricia, he was living in flat number 206 and she was down the hall in 203. He was White, and she was Black, so a friendship — let alone romance — was not allowed, but that didn’t stop them. They went from exchanging pleasantries to sneaking off to underground nightclubs.
As Trevor wrote in his memoir, “He was quiet and reserved; she was wild and free.” Despite their 22-year age gap, “something clicked.”
Patricia asked Robert to father her a child
While there was a true bond between his parents, Trevor couldn't speak to the level of romance in the relationship in his memoir. According to him, Patricia asked Robert to “help me have my kid” and with no strings attached, financial or marital. In simplest terms, she wanted to become a mother and Robert was her ticket there. Robert pushed back, which only made Patricia push harder.
Trevor added that Robert's opposition to starting a family — and the law preventing them from doing so — contributed to her desire. Eventually though, Robert agreed and following the birth of their child, he asked Patricia if he could be part of Trevor’s life. She said yes. “So the three of us formed a kind of family, as much as our peculiar situation would allow. I lived with my mom. We’d sneak around and visit my dad when we could,” Trevor recalled.
Patricia converted to Judaism from Christianity
Trevor was born into a Christian environment and even attended a private Catholic school, but his relationship with faith was impacted when his mother later converted to Judaism. Speaking with NPR about his upbringing, the comedian said he grew up as “a part-white, part-black but then sometimes Jewish kid.”
“I didn't understand because she didn't make me convert,” Trevor explained. “When I turned 13, she threw me a bar mitzvah, but nobody came because nobody knew what the hell that was. I only had black friends — no one knows what the hell you're doing. So it was just me and my mom and she's celebrating and she's reading things to me in Hebrew.”
Patricia married twice and had two more sons
Trevor had a complicated relationship with his stepfather, Abel, whom Patricia married around the same time his father moved to Cape Town. The pair met at an auto garage, where Abel worked as a mechanic. Over the next two years, they moved in together, married and welcomed a son named Andrew. However, as their family life progressed, so did Abel’s relationship with alcohol. He also became violently abusive, directing his anger at both Patricia and Trevor.
“I was a reminder that my mom had lived a life before him. I didn’t even share his color. His family was him, my mom, and the new baby. My family was my mom and me,” Trevor wrote in Born a Crime, adding that Abel never treated him like a son.
Patricia went on to legally divorce Abel, which Trevor described as a separation of “financial affairs” in his memoir. They were still considered traditionally married, but living separate lives. Two years later, when Andrew was 9, Patricia became pregnant. She and Abel welcomed another son named Isaac.
Four years later, Patricia officially left Abel for good and went on to remarry another man, who had children of his own. That same year, Abel allegedly shot Patricia in the butt and head. She spent four days in the hospital, and Abel didn’t serve any time in jail, according to Trevor.
Robert and Trevor lost touch for nine years
When Trevor turned 13, his relationship with Robert hit a major roadblock — one that kept them apart for nearly a decade. Robert had decided to move to Cape Town, and Trevor’s stepfather didn’t approve of Patricia — and by extension, Trevor — staying in close contact with Robert, so they all lost touch.
Fast forward nine years later, at age 24, Trevor decided to track down Robert under his mother’s encouragement. However, because Robert was so private, locating him was extremely difficult. Trevor finally had to get in contact with the Swiss embassy, who after much pestering agreed to get involved. It wasn’t until several months later that Robert and Trevor were able to reunite in person in Cape Town.
“It felt like this ten-year gap in my life closed right up in an instant, like only a day had passed since I’d last seen him,” Trevor wrote of their union.
“I walked out of his house that day an inch taller. Seeing him had reaffirmed his choosing of me. He chose to have me in his life. He chose to answer my letter. I was wanted. Being chosen is the greatest gift you can give to another human being,” he said.
Trevor said Patricia isn’t impressed by his celebrity status
Despite their sometimes tumultuous early years, Trevor and his mom have a close relationship — though she's not one to fawn over his illustrious career. “My mom doesn’t care,” Trevor answered Jimmy Kimmel in response to whether or not Patricia loves that her son is an international star.
In fact, Trevor joked that Jesus is "the only celebrity" his mother truly cares about.